After Jay-Z recorded “Glory” to welcome his new daughter into the world, I wondered what it would sound like if Republican voters made a song to welcome Mitt Romney as their now-inevitable nominee.
“Phony” featuring W.M.R.
Can’t explain how uninspired i feel
Looking at this primary field
Mitt romney, I freaking hate you
I can’t believe the nomination is you
False promises, false starts
Six different frontrunners falling apart
Now look who we’re stuck with
The million dollar Tin Man with no heart.
One percenters, you dance for them
Then you switch up your stance for them
You are amazing, you’re unbelievable
I mean literally, Icannot believe in you
Just an empty suit, who’s really in control?
There’s nothing in your soul except opinion polls
The fakest in a room full of fake actors
You’ve never paid dues, you barely pay taxes
And every time you speak it makes me hate you more and
It’s not cuz your faith is Mormon it’s cuz your so fake and boring.
You’re boring. And Phony. So phony.
boring boring bo
You’re phony it’s never been disputable
You look phony in every interview you do
You look phony at weddings and at funerals
You even look phony singing America the Beautiful
You’re the child of a party’s legacy
Now you’re the child that made that party dead to me.
You’re a smarmy dog-torturing fake moderate turned fake conservative
What a terrible recipe.